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5 Secrets to Find Your Tribe & Be Successful Online

By Nov 14, 2012 July 8th, 2014 32 Comments

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Ever been unsure about how to find your tribe? One thing I can say for sure – I would not be where I am today if I were working by myself. That’s not to say that I didn’t work, and work HARD, to achieve the things I’ve achieved. But I would not have had the opportunities I have been given, and used to reach new levels in my career, without the amazing people around me in this community.

find your tribe

I tend to think of success as having two-fold parts to it. The part that you provide – mostly sweat and skill. And the part that others provide – opportunities, open doors, and a helping hands.

Tips to Find Your Tribe

Opportunities From Your Network

Kelby Carr gave me my first speaking opportunity at the very first Type-A Conference. But that didn’t mean I just showed up and goofed off! I worked hard to make sure that I was giving useful information in my presentations, and I spoke where I had knowledge and skill to share with others. As a result, I’ve been given more opportunities. So tapping into the tribe of colleagues at the website we were both writing for proved to be very beneficial.

When I launched my eBook, 30 Days to Make and Sell a Fabulous eBook, Fran and Tiffany reached out to me and offered me their community to guest post at. And it’s turned into more than one appearance at a Bloggy Bootcamp event to help teach others how to create additional revenue streams from their blog writing!

It was also someone within my tribe who referred my book agent to me. True story. She gave her agent my name and the agent approached me to ask about about a specific title. It was very similar to the book, Backyard Farming on an Acre (More or Less) that is now launching in December!

Not Letting Your Tribe Down

So the other side of all the wonderful things your tribe can do for you is that you can’t drop the ball! What would have happened if Kelby let me come and speak and I didn’t prepare and didn’t do a good job? That opportunity would have been wasted.

If you consistently drop the ball, behave unprofessionally, or fail to support others when THEY have something exciting going on, you will let your tribe down. You will destroy the community camaraderie you have built up around you. And you will find those future opportunities and successes diminishing instead of growing.

Tips to Help Find Your Tribe

1. Comment on their blog posts.
Now with Facebook so popular I’ve noticed a trend of people commenting about a story or post on the facebook status. That’s great, to be sure, but I’ve noticed a decline on comments within the blog itself. Commenting takes an extra 30 seconds but it will stand out to people when you do so.

2. Ask how you can help them.
I have a friend, Danielle Smith, who will sometimes pop on Facebook and say – I’m sharing great posts right now – what do you have for me? And it’s always so encouraging. It probably takes her 15 minutes to do that once a week, but it creates a great sense of community.

3. Go the extra mile to follow through.
I have a tendancy to book myself solid. I mean ZERO wiggle room solid. But when someone from my community is counting on me to make something happen, I will go the extra mile to make sure it happens. It might be at the last second – but I’ll get it done!

What about you? What have others done for you recently that made you feel connected to them and supported? How do you connect with others in your blogging tribe?

About the Author
Angela England is a mother of five living with her children and husband in rural Oklahoma. She is the founder of Untrained Housewife and author of Backyard Farming on an Acre (More or Less).

Disclosure: This post includes affiliate links.


  • Buhle Goslar says:

    Great post. I must say getting people to engage on the blog is a challenge. It seems people engage more on Facebook. Will definitely apply your tips though and keep trying to find my tribe:-)

  • […] / a blog guest post can be a great way to tap into a related audience of blog readers. You can support your fellow tribe members (often a blogger will ask for guest posts during a vacation or illness), while also spreading your […]

  • Great advice, this is really something that I need to work on a lot more. Like some of the other commenters, I’m still really trying to find my tribe. There are some obvious linkages for me, but being a natural introvert this is something I am not comfortable with. I guess I just need to suck it up and push through 🙂

  • Kristiina says:

    Such great advice, thank you!

  • Mimi says:

    Perfect timing! I need to work on building my tribe!

  • Kristen says:

    These were good tips. Thanks for posting about this! I’m still trying to find my tribe. Right now, I think my main issue is that I find blogging to have a high turnover rate. The people who I start to form connections with get busy and abandon their blogs. So, I know I just need to keep working at it!

  • Vicky says:

    I love this post – great reminder that no man (or woman) is an island. I have a hard time connecting sometimes, but getting involved with a community of like-minded people is where I find my bliss consistently. Running a science site full of geniuses, or doing consulting work for amazing bloggers, or joining a local group of volunteer tutors, it’s the stuff I do in coordination with others that is most rewarding.

    • That’s exactly how I feel managing the group of writers at Blissfully Domestic and the amazing community taking shape at Untrained Housewife. Working with a group of writers towards a common goal? Amazing!

  • I love these tips, Angela. I think you’re right that we can have several different tribes (interests) all at the same time. We just need to be cautious that we don’t spread ourselves too thin. (I know of which I speak. haha) But there are ways around that. I think the keyword for me is “focus.” And along with that is “follow through.”

    You’ve shared some great point. Thank you.


  • Barbara says:

    these are some really great tips!

  • Nice blog. I also have noticed that it is easier to post on Facebook. I usually hit the like button, then in the comment section of Facebook I say, Left a message on your website. I’ve only been blogging since May 27th but I’ve noticed people appreciate it.

    Trying to find my peeps but with full-time work some of that effort will have to wait for down time. I’m trying to get a tribe of writers and readers who like my novels.

    Thanks for the tips.

    PS. Who is in your tribe?

    • My tribe? So many. And in a lot of ways the answer to that question would depend on the situation. I am friends with some of the conference coordinators through my speaking and traveling. I am connected with beginning bloggers through my ebooks and teaching sessions. I am connected with homeschooling mommas through teaching my own littles. Which is a good point I didn’t think of when writing this post….tribes can be fluid and morphing…they aren’t rigid and exclusive. 🙂

  • Sierra says:

    I’m still looking for my tribe as well. Thank you for posting the suggestions and tips. I have found a lot of the suggestions very helpful!

  • I have not found my “tribe” althogh I have certainly been trying. Apparently I’m not doing the right things, though. I think some of my problem is that I know how busy I am so I don’t want to bother other people who I know are busy, too.

  • Alison says:

    Love your tips, Angela. It’s all about having each other’s backs!

    • Absolutely!! And realizing that when a friend refers you to someone – whether it’s a blogging op, a joint giveaway, or an email intro to a potential client – she has put her reputation in YOUR hands. Step up, make the most of a small opportunity by completely rocking it, and more will come your way. AND you will have shown the greatest respect and appreciation to your friend by making her look good.

  • Great points here… thanks! I love the idea of actively sharing/promoteing your “tribe” buddies’ great posts… very very nice idea

  • Great tips, thanks for sharing.

  • Since starting my blog, I have discovered so many new blogs and people. Building those relationships has been truly gratifying. I am enjoying finding my tribe – thank you for the tips!

  • Laurali Star says:

    This is what I love about SITS Girls, what a superb concept. This post couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m in the mid to final stages of finishing Pop! Sparkle and Shine Club and its such a big project that I’m actually looking for team collaborators. I’ve met a lot of nice women through here and in other networks and I don’t doubt for a minute, the right ones will show up at just the right time. I’m only semi-promoting at the moment because there’s so much work to be done. Loving every minute of it though and can’t wait to work with my own tribe:) Thanks for the great advice!

    • How exciting! It’s always really great to see a project coming to fruition after so much work and effort. Be wise with who you partner with. Find people who complement you and fill gaps in your own strength set.

  • I agree that it is so important to find the extra time. Also that there is very little of it. But I am firm, firm believer in what goes around comes around!
    One thing I want to add, particularly to the people who are concerned that their niche and tribe have to be a cohesive unit, I don’t think that is true. I think writing and commenting as the REAL you is what will help you build your tribe. You never know who you will find out there that you never thought you would have anything in common with!
    Excellent article, thanks for the great tips!

  • becca says:

    great tips i need to start doing some of these

  • Raquel says:

    Great advice and so fitting for the support system that is here at SITS. I connected with several SITS girls and they are amazing people. We started out connecting by commenting on each other’s blogs, but now we connect by sharing content on Twitter, Facebook, and Stumble Upon. We even get together in person when we can and support each other outside of the blog.

  • Charlotte says:

    This is great advice… I try to be as supportive as possible with my fellow bloggers, but as you touched on here, sometimes we have the tendency to overexert ourselves and it becomes difficult to find the time. But going that extra mile can make all the difference.

    It’s incredibly inspiring to hear about all of the opportunities you have had as a result of networking and finding your tribe online. Thanks so much for this!

  • Kate Burt says:

    Thanks for the encouraging tips/suggestions. Like Kerry Ann, I’m still trying to build a tribe and I’m wondering if its because I also might not fit into any one particular niche. But I’m enjoying my blog and the interactions I’ve been having so far.

  • Julie Moore says:

    Love the advice! I’ve made some friends already (mostly through SITS) that are just amazing! If they can help, they do and visa versa. I think the biggest thing that you can do for your “tribe” is the support, like you say. Comment, promote them without being asked, care – tell the world how amazing they are. If you want support, you have to be support. Give to get, but don’t give just to get – give that plug, that comment, that love because you want to first, not because you expect anything in return. I can tell (and most of the world can, too) when you’re just kissing keester to get something. Be real. If you sincerely like something or someone, let them know. It makes all the difference.

  • Great tips. I’m still searching for my “tribe.” It’s been quite a challenge since I don’t fall into any particular niche. Your Backyard Farming book sounds intriguing—I might have to check it out 🙂

    • Dez says:

      Ack! I hear you loud and clear here, Kerry. I joined hoping to find people blogging about their house build and/or home renos, and I havn’t really been able to find anyone. Maybe I just don’t know what I am doing, because I am new to this…? I say this in the spirit of commiseration, but also in the hopes that if someone is blogging either of those things…let me know and I will gladly support you and your blogging endeavors!

      • Ben says:

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    • I think it’s important to realize that your tribe doesn’t have to be other bloggers who are doing exactly the same thing you are. Your tribe can be people who get and understand YOU. I am in a group of homeschool bloggers, for example, even though I rarely post personally about homeschooling. I AM a homeschooling mom so that effects my life, my work style, even the schedule that I keep. Your tribe may or may not be exactly in your niche…it may just be people you are connected to in one small thread.

      • Sonia Barton says:

        That was one of the things that surprised me at boggy boot camp las Vegas, when Tiffany said that it would be better if you had people in your tribe that had different types of blogs, not all similar to what you do.